


prove to me i'm not gonna die alone

by orphan_account



Category: Bully (Video Games), Warriors - Erin Hunter
Genre: Angst, Bigotry & Prejudice, BloodClan (Warriors), Cat AU, Character Death, Crossover, Crush at First Sight, Crushes, Death, Developing Relationship, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Murder, Mystery, Near Death Experiences, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Prophecy, RiverClan (Warriors), Slow Burn, because its setting the scene, but like warrior cats style, everyone calls jimmy a kittypet, jimmy idolizes zoe, most characters have warrior names and will be referred to as such, rated 16+ for the death, the cats say fuck, they are cats, this IS a smopkins fic but the first chapter wont look like it, this au is completely self indulgent so
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 09:21:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22967647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Jimmy had never heard of the five warrior Clans untilshecame to BloodClan, begging his leader for a second chance. Edgar refused.
Relationships: Jimmy Hopkins/Gary Smith
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> guess who wrote a warrior cats/bully crossover. its me. i killed cringe culture.  
>   
> quick notes:  
> lavendermist = gord, vixenpaw = gary, crabstar = crabblesnitch, other warrior names for this chapter are explained in the text!

Jimmy had been raised in BloodClan, born to former kittypet Candace. He had never known who his father was, but Candace had enough mates that it didn't seem to matter. A father figure was something that had both been ever-present in Jimmy's short lifespan in the Clan, and yet not really present at all.

Jimmy still remembered his Twoleg days well. Stretched out by a fire, or batting balls of yarn around with tiny kitten claws... it had been nice, Jimmy had to admit. He had been the only one of his mother's litter to survive, so he had been spoiled by her appropriately. The orange she-cat would often take time out her day to groom behind Jimmy's ear and play with him with gentle, motherly touches that would last as sharp remembrances for the remainder of Jimmy's lifetime.

That had been then, however. This was now. Shortly after turning seven moons old, their Twolegs had moved, abandoning their kittypets. His mother had been left with nowhere to go except for the surrounding Twolegplace, only some of which was familiar territory to her. She had been a mostly inside cat.

They had wandered for what felt like moons, but could only be days, when they had stumbled across Edgar's gang of bloodthirsty cats. BloodClan, they called themselves. 

They were savage animals who ran Twolegplace with tooth and claw. Jimmy had never witnessed it, but he heard that cats tended to die, or simply disappear, under the Clan's ruthless leadership. Edgar was a dictator. He was wise, and sharp, and knew how to manipulate others to get what he wanted. The collar he wore, lined with dog's teeth, proved as a testament to his power, and his inner circle was filled with mean, vicious cats who would attack anyone for their leader.

It was with these cats that Candace and her son sought shelter. They took her in, with one condition: that she learn how to defend herself. BloodClan had no buisness with the weak and unfortunate, and if they wanted to survive here, they would have to get over their soft ways. That's when Candace started taking mates. It was easier for her to keep her claws unsheathed if there was a tom to look after her.

Jimmy was raised by these fierce and unpredictable cats. Many times did he feel their claws digging into his fur, even if he was still quite young. He learned to scavenge for food for him and his mother. Then he learned how to stalk, to hunt. Then he learned how to fight. And then he learned how to kill.

Jimmy patiently worked his way into Edgar's inner circle. It wasn't easy, but he managed. Edgar watched over his every move. With any mis-step, he would be threatened with exile. So eventually Jimmy learned how to stop mis-stepping, until every move was cold and calculating. 

This was how things were. This was how Jimmy had thought they'd always be. He couldn't have been more wrong.

-

"Sir, I have a report from the west-side border patrol." Omar's voice rang loud and clear. The pale ginger tom's stance held confidence, but uncertainty sparked in his gaze.

Jimmy looked up from his paws. He had just finished a quick meal, and crunching down on pigeon bones had dirtied his coarse fur. He lowered a paw to hear what Omar had to say.

Edgar had sat up. The black-furred tom had piercing amber eyes that bored through Omar's tabby pelt. "Speak, then."

"Yes, sir." Omar sat up straighter. "Jerry and Otto were on patrol near the Twoleg foodplace when they found an old time member of ours. Zoe."

The silence ringing throughout the small area was deafening. From his perch on the Twoleg dumpster, Edgar drew his lips back in a snarl. "Zoe? Are you sure?" 

Jimmy was curious. He had never heard of this cat before, but the hatred radiating from the others spoke volume to what she must be like. _A Clan traitor, perhaps?_

"Yes, sir. She said she wants to speak with you." Omar's confidence seemed to waver as he shifted on his paws. 

"Is her brother with her?" 

"No, sir. She's alone." 

"Very well." Edgar lashed his tail. "Jimmy, go with Omar. Make sure Zoe doesn't attack him and his patrol."

Jimmy dipped his head to his leader. "Yes, sir."

"Go." Edgar flicked his tail, dismissing them. Jimmy rose to his paws and padded after Omar, following him towards the Twoleg foodplace.

-

When Jimmy saw Zoe, he had only one thought in his head.

Zoe was beautiful. She was one of the most beautiful cats he had ever seen. Dark ginger fur ran over her pelt, which was crisscrossed with scars, and she had beautiful amber eyes with soft white paws. She seemed three seconds away from kicking anyone's ass, spitting at one of the BloodClan members as they inched towards her. Jimmy was angry to see that they were treating her like a plaything.

"Edgar has accepted your request, traitor." Omar growled, deep and angry. Jimmy was surprised. He eyed Omar suspciously, and then turned to look at Zoe, who had her fur fluffed out defensively.

"Then let's get to it, mousebrain." Zoe puffed out her chest and marched forward. Omar lashed out with a paw, striking her behind the ear. She flinched, looking like she wanted to retaliate; instead, she lowered her head and dropped back in line.

Jimmy stared at Omar from the corner of his eye as they walked, falling into an even line. Omar and Jimmy led, with Jerry and Otto taking the rear, causing Zoe to be lodged in between them all like a prisoner. This didn't feel right. Setting his face in a grimace, he rose his head and lashed his tail. 

"Is there any reason why we're beating up this cat?" He hissed in a low tone to Omar. Omar jerked his head to the side, leveling Jimmy with a icy glare.

"Do you mean to tell me you don't know her?" 

"Of course not. I've never heard of a cat named Zoe." 

Omar lashed his tail. He seemed angry, angrier than he had been when confronting Edgar. "Zoe is related to a cat named Bif." Jimmy remembered that Edgar had mentioned a brother, and decided that must be the relation in question. "Bif tried to kill Edgar."

"What?" Jimmy's eyes widened. Out of all the things someone could do, Jimmy could only imagine killing their leader.

"When questioned, Zoe admitted she had planned the entire thing." Omar huffed, his eyes looking ahead. "Zoe and Bif had hated Edgar's leadership. They wanted BloodClan to be a 'true' Clan."

"What?" Jimmy looked at the tom in confusion. Omar sighed.

"That's right... I forget sometimes that you've spent the majority of your life as a kittypet. BloodClan was named after the five 'true' warrior Clans. They live by their own code, and seem to have their own religion and way of life. We only share a name - BloodClan - not a way of thinking. Zoe and Bif didn't like our way of thinking, and they wanted things to change."

"Zoe made up the plan to kill our leader when he was unguarded. Bif attempted, but Clint and I walked in on it and was able to stop it. We questioned Bif's entire family; he seemed to have been hiding something. Zoe admitted to helping with the plan. As punishment, Edgar had us injure their parents, then hold them back from helping them. He wanted them to see their parents suffer before they died."

Jimmy shivered. He could only imagine how painful that must have been. _Was that really a fair way to punish them?_ He pushed the thought away. Of course it was, if Edgar ordered it. He's the leader, and they tried to kill him.

"After that, they were banished from BloodClan territory. Edgar said if he found them here again, he'd kill them. Zoe swore that they'd find the 'true' Clans and live with them. We haven't seen them since."

Jimmy thought about this, and then glanced over his shoulder to look at Zoe. The she-cat was looking down at her paws as she walked. _So she's from BloodClan._

 _If she was banished, why come back here? What was the purpose?_ "Is Edgar going to kill her?"

"I'm assuming." Omar looked at Jimmy, a serious expression on his face. "She shouldn't have come back if she wanted to live."

Jimmy felt a chill run down his spine at those words.

-

Jimmy settled down in the small area as Zoe stood in front of Edgar's dumpster. The cat in question was glaring down at her, eyes blazing with unbridled fury. He twitched his tail and rose his chin.

"You dare show your face here, traitor?" Edgar spat. "You better have a good reason."

Zoe looked exhausted, but as Edgar addressed her, her eyes blazed. "I don't go by Zoe anymore. I've been renamed."

"Oh, the traitor's been renamed! I'm sure that'll go over well. Please, let me hear you and your brother's new names, just so I can be _kind_." Edgar's voice dripped with sarcasm, and the cats around him rumbled with laughter. Zoe seemed to falter, and then continued.

"I... I was just named a warrior, so I went by Strikemist. Bif is named Brokenrye now. You... I've been exiled, so I don't care if you don't respect my name. But Brokenrye has done nothing wrong. You should call him by his proper name."

"I don't have to do anything for a murderer." Edgar lashed his tail. "I ask you again, Zoe," she flinched at the venom in his voice, "why did you come back here? You aren't welcome."

Zoe was silent for a moment. Then, "The Clans... I got kicked out, okay? I... this stupid apprentice accused me of spying for another Clan leader because he didn't like how much Crabstar liked me! I hate him! Vixenpaw is literally-"

"Boo hoo." Edgar scoffed, but Jimmy's ears perked up with interest. Vixenpaw got the Clan to turn against her? That seemed interesting. "And your brother? What did he say?"

"Brokenrye claimed to have no knowledge of it, okay? Because it wasn't happening!" She seemed distressed. "I came back here because I have - or had, friends here. It's the only other place I've ever called home. I'm willing to obey your command. Please don't bring my brother into this."

"You brought your brother into this when you plotted to kill me!" Edgar hissed. "And do you really think any of my warriors will trust you after the stunt you pulled? You'll have no one here!"

Zoe flinched. Jimmy felt sorry for the she-cat. She was so beautiful, and seemed to have such a sharp mind. He shifted his paws and rose his tail. Edgar flicked his eyes to Jimmy. "What is it?"

"With all due respect... sir," He could hear the others whispering behind him, and his ear flicked. "Perhaps it'd be better to let her in? We've been looking to recruit new cats, and she..." He trailed off at the look on Edgar's face.

"I'm disappointed in you, Jimmy. I expected you of all cats to not defend a traitor." Jimmy flinched and looked down at his paws. "In fact, why don't we test your loyalty? Kill her."

"Wh-what?" He spluttered.

"You heard me. Attack, Jimmy, or I'll have no other option but to exile you."

Exile. The threat had been used against him more than once, but usually in better circumstances. Jimmy was mouthy, and didn't know how to keep his opinions to himself, so he often got in trouble, but never for something as dire as this. Jimmy turned his head and locked eyes with Zoe.

Zoe unsheathed her claws, backing away from Jimmy as he rose to his paws. The BloodClan members boxed her in. She snarled at him.

The tom leapt at her, sinking his claws into her fur. He had no other choice, he told himself. She yowled and it physically hurt him. He had never fought a woman before.

Woman or no, Zoe was powerful. She struck out with her back legs and sunk her teeth into his foreleg until he screeched. He pummeled her belly and flipped her over, going for her neck, but she moved her head just in time. They rolled over and over in the clearing, while Edgar watched them with twisted pleasure in his eyes. Jimmy felt sick.

Eventually Jimmy was able to snap his jaws around her neck, biting down. She screeched, falling limp. He dropped her and stepped back, panting from the physical exertion of the battle. He felt guilty. Blood stained his pelt, and his wounds stung. He had never fought in an honorless battle before.

"Good." Edgar seemed pleased. He flicked his tail. "I'll see to this cat's burial later. I want her to sit here as a testament to the treatment that traitors should get should they choose to betray me." Jimmy shivered.

He stood there as Otto and Jerry eventually wandered away. Edgar eventually called Omar into a side alley, and the two toms went off on a walk together. As the sun set over Twolegplace, Jimmy ended up being alone.

It wasn't like Jimmy had never killed someone before, but he had never killed someone who had a personality such as this. Usually the cats he killed were those who threatened BloodClan; but, despite her story, Zoe didn't seem like a threat. Jimmy let his eyes land on her. _Strikemist._ Perhaps he should be calling her by that name instead. She did say it was about honor, after all.

Jimmy was startled as Strikemist coughed blood. She was still bleeding heavily, and Jimmy had thought she was dead; he crossed the clearing to stand next to her, licking her behind her ears worriedly. "Z- uh, Strikemist? Are you okay?"

Strikemist realed back with a hiss and then coughed furiously. She was still heavily bleeding, and Jimmy knew if she didn't get treated soon, she'd die. But Jimmy had no knowledge of herbs, and they were too far away from a vet. He stared at her.

"You..." She glowered up at him. "You're the one who tried to stand up for me, a-aren't you?"

Jimmy pricked his ears and nodded. "Yes, I am. My name is Jimmy."

"Jimmy. Jimmy. Listen." He got closer to her. Her voice was scratchy and weak. It made him feel awful. _I did that to her. ___

__

"You... you need to go back to RiverClan." She coughed. He flicked his ear, surprised. "Tell Brokenrye not to look for me. He was... he was going to come back too, if I convinced Edgar."

 _But she hadn't been able to._ Jimmy understood. Brokenrye was the only family she had left. He dipped his head down to touch his nose to her forehead as the she-cat's breathing slowed, and then her flank fell still.

-

Jimmy decided to set out once the moon started to rise. His scratches stung.

After some asking around, Jimmy had figured out where these Clans were. Apparently, they were only half a day away. Jimmy wondered how they could be so close; he had never heard of them before in his life.

Jimmy had scrambled over fences and through Twoleg gardens, crossing dangerous thunderpaths with monsters whose eyes glowed in the dark. He had never been so far away from his Clan before, but he was determined. If there was one thing Jimmy was, it was honorable. He wanted to carry out Strikemist's dying wish.

He found the forest that had been spoken of to him by the time the sun was rising over the horizon. He was tired, but pushed on until he smelled a sharp boundary line. A border. He paused, wondering if he should cross it; but this territory was unfamiliar to him, and he decided against it.

Jimmy sat down next to a bush, eyeing the Clan boundary. The sun rose slowly, and Jimmy twitched his ear as birds began chirping. He would hunt on his way back, but for now he remained focused on his task.

A rustle in the bushes signaled a patrol. A group of cats burst out. Jimmy didn't hide, and they spotted him. One of them bristled, but the other murmured something to him in a low voice. The first twitched his tail and stayed behind with another, who looked much younger. Then the calmer of the three stepped forward.

"Who are you?" His voice was condescending, and he sniffed Jimmy's pelt. Jimmy bristled slightly, but remained calm otherwise.

"My name is Jimmy." Jimmy dipped his head. "I've brought a message from Strikemist to Brokenrye."

"Strikemist?" His eyes widened. "But she's a spy! What message could she possibly have for him?"

Jimmy leveled the tom with a stare. "Strikemist is dead."

He looked shocked. Grief entered his gaze. "You're joking?"

"No." Jimmy stared ahead of him at the fiercer of the two. "This is RiverClan, yes?"

"Yes. My... my name is Lavendermist. Great StarClan, I..." He shook his head. "What was the message? I can take it back to Brokenrye."

"Strikemist says not to come after her. The plan didn't work." Jimmy looked at the cat. Confusion spread across his face, but then he nodded. "That is all." 

Jimmy dipped his head to the cat and turned around. He headed back into Twolegplace, leaving the Clan cats behind.

-

Jimmy found himself back in his own Clan's territory sometime after sunhigh. He had stopped to hunt and rest along the way, his paws tired from the day's travel, and was now glad to be home. He started towards the den he shared with his mother; he had no duties today, and saw no reason to head to Edgar's hideout.

He pushed into the den, but his mother's scent was stale. Odd. She hadn't had a mate in a couple moons, and had been spending more time in the den. Jimmy pushed further into the den, and was startled when met with the blinding gaze of Omar.

"Jimmy." Omar glowered at him. "Edgar wants to see you."

Jimmy was confused. It wasn't like Edgar to have cats wait at his den; usually, if Jimmy was busy, Edgar would simply wait for him to return to Edgar's hideout on his own accord. Jimmy never wandered very far, preferring the familiarity of his Clanmates.

Now, he was being led out of his own den like a prisoner. His strong muscles flexed underneath his pelt as he followed Omar to Edgar's hideout.

The black tom was sitting on top of his Twoleg dumpster like normal. He narrowed his eyes at Jimmy as Jimmy stepped into the clearing. Alarm raced through him as he recognized his mother, sitting next to the body of Strikemist.

"Jimmy." Edgar twitched his tail. "Where have you been?"

Jimmy had no reason to lie. He dipped his head respectfully to his leader. "Strikemist was not dead when you left her. She woke up shortly after and requested I deliver a message to her brother before she died."

"And you delivered this message for her?"

"Yes. I thought of it as the respectful thing to do." Jimmy glanced around uneasily. _Why does everyone seem so upset?_

"So you were conspiring with the enemy?" 

Shock raced through Jimmy's fur. "What? No! I have never even heard of Zoe - I-I mean Strikemist, before today." 

"Yet you carried out her dying wish!" Edgar yowled. "That is not the BloodClan way!"

Jimmy took a step back. He was startled. Edgar was shaking with rage.

"I never should have let you or your kittypet mother stay here. You have done nothing but question by commands and carry out tasks behind my back." He twitched his tail. "You must be punished."

 _Is he going to kill me?_ Horror washed over Jimmy. "Sir, I-"

"Silence!" Edgar hissed. "Omar!"

"Yes, sir?" Omar looked up at his leader. A sick glint was in his eyes. He seemed to be enjoying this.

"Kill her. Kill the kittypet."

Alarm and anger shook Jimmy to his core. "No!" He gasped, and lunged forward. He was slammed to the ground by three massive BloodClan cats as Omar stalked forward. "No! She hasn't done anything wrong! Edgar, stop!"

Omar swiped a paw at his mother. Claws caught her, and she squealed. She went to race away, but Omar pounced on her. He sank his teeth deep into her neck fur.

Jimmy yowled, thrashing. He turned on the three cats holding him back and attacked. He had never considered attacking Clanmates before, but fury blinded him. His claws sliced over Clint's face, aiming to blind.

The three barreled him over, and the sound of his mother's corpse hitting the ground hit his ear. "No! Mom!"

"Release him." Edgar's voice came from above.

Jimmy raced away from them as soon as he was released, diving at his mother. Omar was licking his paws, and Jimmy buried his nose in his mother's fur. His vision blurred. How could these cats do this to her? Had they no honor? He rose his head to level Edgar with a glare.

"Get out." Edgar's voice cut the silence. "You're no longer welcome here, kittypet. If we see you on BloodClan territory again, we'll kill you." 

Grief stung his throat, and he lowered his head, pressing his muzzle to his mother's fur. Then, he turned and walked away, heading into the Twolegplace.

-

Jimmy had never had the best relationship with his mother.

It had always been strained. She constantly neglected him, or let her mates berate him. But she was his mother, damn it. This was never how he wanted things to end between them.

He staggered through Twolegplace. He didn't have anywhere to go, but saw no reason to go anywhere. He eventually collapsed under a bush, and slept.

He dreamt of Strikemist. Her beautiful amber eyes blinked at him. Something was different about her; stars speckled her fur, making her glow. She brushed against his pelt, and then looked down. He followed her gaze to find that he was standing in a river.

 _RiverClan_. The thought made his head jerk upwards, and he woke up, blinking. RiverClan would know about these strange siblings, and besides, RiverClan had taken Strikemist in before, hadn't they? And they seemed to be honorable.

 _It isn't necessarily home, but it could be_. Jimmy pushed himself to his paws and set to his goal.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nectarpaw - petey, deerlight - danvers, dawnfrost - pinky, pounceleaf - chad, gorsestem - derby !

Jimmy's paws were tired by the time he reached the edge of Twolegplace. He forced himself to settle down, eating a quick meal and catching a nap. By the time he awoke it was sunrise, and Jimmy stretched, his jaws parting in a yawn.

He hadn't exactly thought about how he would handle his confrontation with RiverClan. He didn't know if banishment was a good reason for joining a Clan. But, regardless, Jimmy assumed he had to try. He had nowhere else to go, and his curiosity about Strikemist was overwhelming. He wanted to know what exactly had happened to her.

His jaws parted to taste the air as he drew closer to the RiverClan boundary. How exactly should he go about this? If he was met by a border portral, they may be hostile towards him, and chase him away. But if he started into their territory without their permission, wouldn't it be taken as a sign of attack? Jimmy stood there with his tail in the air, puzzled over what to do.

His ears pricked, drawing him from his thoughts as a low growl resonated from the forest. Jimmy froze, and stayed still. The only thing about him that changed was his claws unsheathing. 

A cat stalked out from the undergrowth. He had dark brown fur with amber eyes that flashed in the sunlight. A scar crossed his face that looked only inches away from blinding him. He drew his lips back in a snarl.

A flash of recognition raced through Jimmy. He had seen this cat yesterday, when he had been talking with Lavendermist. The young cat had been standing with a much older one. Jimmy forced his muscles to relax, though it was proving quite difficult as the cat's glare increased in intensity.

"Greetings. My name is Jimmy, and I come in peace." Jimmy dipped his head to the cat. He seemed about Jimmy's age, maybe a little older. Despite that, Jimmy seemed to be the calmer of the two in this situation, and Jimmy flicked his ear.

"I know who you are. I saw you yesterday, kittypet." The cat spat and then sniffed condescendingly. Jimmy jerked his head up and frowned.

"I'm not a kittypet."

"Oh, really? Is that why you smell like Twoleg scraps and monster feet?" He rolled his eyes, lashing his tail. "I'll believe it when I see it."

Anger flashed in Jimmy's pelt. Who did this cat think he was? "Again. I've come in peace. I can always leave."

"Good. Leave." The cat stared at him, a teasing glint touching his eye. "Or are you too much of a coward to stay behind and fight?"

Fight? Is that all this warrior wanted to do? Jimmy was bewildered. This did not seem like the honorable deed Strikemist had spoken of. 

"Listen, I-" Jimmy was cut off by a rustle in the bushes, and his hackles rose. The cat in front of him seemed caught off guard too, whipping around and then relaxing.

The newcomer was a silver cat with black patches across his fur. He had striking yellow eyes that spoke of insurmountable intelligence. "I've heard everything." He said before the first cat could interrupt. "I don't think provoking a fight is part of the warrior code, Vixenpaw."

 _Vixenpaw?_ The name flashed through Jimmy's head. This had been the cat that Strikemist said had her exiled. He stared at him. For some reason, he was a lot less intimidating than he had expected.

"And how would you know anything about the code, Nectarpaw?" Vixenpaw's purr was silky, and he brushed his fur against the smaller tom's side. "You're a medicine cat, not a warrior."

"Medicine cat?" Jimmy frowned. What was that? And what was this code? Was it like a set of rules, or?

"StarClan, do you not know anything?" Vixenpaw glowered at him. Jimmy felt his pelt heat up. He shifted his paws self-consiously. 

"Be nice." Nectarpaw chastised his companion and looked towards Jimmy. "You've come to join our Clan, yes?"

Jimmy was surprised. "I- well, yeah. How'd you know?"

"It was predicted. Come." Nectarpaw jerked his head, beckoning for Jimmy to follow him. "Crabstar is already aware. He'll be happy to have you here."

Jimmy was confused. Was it supposed to be this easy? Hesitantly, he stepped over the border. Vixenpaw eyed him. He'd have to be careful with this. 

-

Jimmy had never seen so many cats in his life.

The camp clearing was full of them. It was nearly overwhelming for an outsider like himself. Eyes turned on him and stared; some hackles rose sharply, defensive. Jimmy was nervous. If they decided to turn him away in violence, he didn't think he'd be able to fight his way out.

He was led by the two apprentices to a small, light-brown tabby sitting near a tall rock. She was frowning.

"What is this? Why have you brought a rogue into our camp?" She scowled down at Vixenpaw and Nectarpaw. Vixenpaw rolled his eyes, but Nectarpaw simply dipped his head, respectful.

"I had a sign from StarClan." Nectarpaw declared. Some of the cats around him gasped, and Jimmy could feel them shifting closer to him, curious. "They predicted that this cat would save us. I don't know what from, but I believe we should allow him to join our Clan. I've already talked to Crabstar about it, Deerlight, and he has agreed."

The she-cat - Deerlight - shifted on her paws. She looked surprised, but instead of expressing it, she simply nodded. "Crabstar is out right now. You're welcome to wait inside his den until he returns."

"Thank you, Deerlight," Nectarpaw dipped his head and flicked his tail, signaling for Jimmy to follow. He trailed behind as Vixenpaw stayed in the clearing, watching them leave curiously.

-

"So what exactly is 'StarClan'?" Jimmy asked. He had taken to batting a pebble under his pawpads, bored out of his mind. They had been waiting in the den for what felt like moons, yet still Crabstar was 'out.' Where he had gone to, Jimmy did not know.

"StarClan is like..." Nectarpaw had been intently watching Jimmy. "They're like, well. They're like our dead ancestors, does that make sense? They watch over us through silverpelt - which is, uh, the band of stars across the sky - and sometimes offer us guidance."

"That's wild." Jimmy shook out his fur. "We never had anything like that in BloodClan."

Nectarpaw eyed him curiously. "Why aren't you still in BloodClan, Jimmy? It's odd to suddenly leave your home."

Jimmy shook his head, indicating that he didn't want to talk about it. Nectarpaw nodded, respectful. Jimmy settled down again by the den wall, his tail flicking restlessly as he urged Crabstar to get here already.

-

Crabstar was really old, and really snarky.

He looked at Jimmy with a withering look and then turned his attention to Nectarpaw. "You say this is the one?"

"Yes, he's the one that will join our Clan." Nectarpaw dipped his head.

Crabstar looked again at Jimmy. "Listen here, kit. You will be expected to give up the ways of outsiders and learn how to abide by our rules. If you choose to take on a warrior name, and live under our customs, then you must stay with us forever. You may not live with a paw in both worlds."

Jimmy had never stopped to consider the consequences of this decision. For a second, he paused to think over the words. If he decided to stay, he would never go by his old name, or see his old home. _But what's the point of that, anyway? Mom is dead. I have no home._

"I understand, sir."

Crabstar leveled him with an approving stare.

"Good."

-

"Let all cats old enough to swim join together beneath the tallrock for a Clan meeting."

Jimmy had situated himself beneath the tallrock, sandwiched between Nectarpaw and Vixenpaw, the later of which had joined them after Jimmy exited from the leader's den. Jimmy's eyes skirted the clearing momentarily, and he picked up the pelt color of the warrior he had talked to about Brokenrye - Lavendermist, he said his name was.

"Cats of RiverClan. Our medicine cats have recieved a prophecy from StarClan." Crabstar looked to the side. "Will Dawnfrost please tell the Clan what Nectarpaw has envisioned?"

A pretty cream she-cat stood on her paws near the edge of the clearing, dipping her head to Crabstar. "Nectarpaw saw an uprising." She paused as the Clan murmured to themselves, waiting for them to pull themselves together before continuing. "This cat - Jimmy - stopped it. StarClan has foretold that he will save us from unnecessary bloodshed and dictatorship."

The Clan was silent for a moment. "Does StarClan really hate us so much that they need a kittypet to do their bidding?" A voice yowled from the back of the clearing. Jimmy flattened his ears to his head. He was not a kittypet!

"Nonsense, Pounceleaf." Crabstar flicked his tail dismissively. "If StarClan hated us, they would not have sent him. That's why I'm allowing him to join our Clan as an apprentice."

A murmur started in the Clan, and Jimmy shifted his paws uneasily. Was this really so difficult for the Clan cats to accept? He didn't understand. It wasn't as if he had done anything wrong yet.

Crabstar scanned his Clan with a cold gaze until they fell silent. "Jimmy, you are over six moons old. That means you are able to take on apprentice duties. From here on out, you will be known as Sunpaw." He turned his head. "Your mentor will be Gorsestem."

A brown-and-cream tabby stepped up to the tallrock. He had a light frown on his face. His eyes landed on Sunpaw.

"Touch noses with him." Nectarpaw whispered. Sunpaw flicked his tail in acknowledgement and stepped forward, touching noses with his new mentor.

His new Clanmates greeted him with yowls, his new name ringing around the forest.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy some bantar.mp4

The transition from BloodClan to RiverClan was very difficult for Jimmy.

In BloodClan, Jimmy was respected, and even feared. He had silenced many with his claws and glares and had become a valued member of the Clan. Edgar had liked him, and Jimmy considered them to be genuine friends, even if Edgar wasn't ever one to show it due to being a leader.

In RiverClan, however, Jimmy was stripped of his name and given a new one - Sunpaw - that had a lot more meaning than he realized. As Sunpaw, he was neither respected, nor feared. Many would simply sneer at him, and he found himself most isolated. If he wasn't being actively shunned for being an outsider, then he was being treated like a kit who didn't know the first thing about anything. It infuriated him.

At the center of this was Vixenpaw, who Sunpaw was still sure he wanted to figure out. It was curious; despite Sunpaw being detested, Vixenpaw seemed to have it even worse. The Clan would give him cold eyes and in return he would hiss at them. Disrespect seemed to be a part of his game, and there was a certain level of admirability in it for Sunpaw, who wouldn't allow himself to stoop down to that level just yet. He was doing this for Strikemist - or Zoe, or whatever name she had preferred before she died - and he really, really didn't want to fuck it up.

It was also weird that Vixenpaw seemed to be directly connected to her. She mentioned him before she died. But Sunpaw pushed that thought away.

Sunpaw had trouble adjusting to the routined structure of Clan life as well. BloodClan had some structure, but it wasn't so strict, and it didn't have so many rules. Sunpaw couldn't even take food for himself without feeding others - it was a stark contrast from his old life, where the strongest prevailed over anyone else.

He refused to think about his mom through all this. He just couldn't handle it. Not yet.

-

"Come on, Sunpaw," Vixenpaw's voice was loud enough to scare away any prey that might be nearby, and Sunpaw flicked his tail warily, "We're supposed to be hunting, not moping."

Sunpaw was quiet. He had been all morning. He hadn't been eager to get out of his nest this morning, not looking forward to another day in this foreign place. He couldn't particularly say he liked the Clans yet, and that was what bothered him the most about anything.

"We'd catch more if you would shut the fuck up." Sunpaw hissed. Vixenpaw stared at him as if he wasn't sure what Sunpaw just said, then sneered.

"Stop using your Twoleg words with me, kittypet. I already told you, no one knows what in StarClan's name you're saying."

"Fuck is just an accentuator." Sunpaw shrugged. "I'm sorry that your language is so dull."

Vixenpaw scowled.

Sunpaw had been given a partnered hunting assignment, and of course he had to be assigned to the most obnoxious cat of them all. In all honesty, however, Sunpaw didn't mind Vixenpaw all that much. He peaked Sunpaw's curiosity and tended to make things more interesting. But this morning, Sunpaw wasn't in the mood to deal with him.

"Stupid kitty," Vixenpaw was hissing in a mocking tone. "Can't concentrate if the annoying denmate is speaking, can you? I hope you drown in a river."

"Thanks." Sunpaw pushed past Vixenpaw, leaving the other cat steaming with fury. Honestly? _Fuck_ partnered hunting. He'd catch some prey for his Clan on his own.

Sunpaw opened his jaws and drew in the scents of the forest. That was another thing he was still getting used to - the scents, and particularly the layout, of the forest. In his old home, where Twoleg stench covered every inch of open ground, natural scents were more repressed and harder to locate. But here? Here, the scents were so vibrant that they made Sunpaw dizzy with bliss. 

Sunpaw stepped over a tree root, letting the scents guide him through the forest. It was still hard nailing down the layout of this place, but only because it was unfamiliar. Knowledge would come with time. And it wasn't like he didn't know anything about it - his mentor had taken him on a tour of the territory a few days ago, so he knew the basics of where things were. He just didn't know the intricate details yet.

Finally, his tongue led him to a sparrow pecking at the ground, presumably in search of worms. Sunpaw dropped into a low crouch. Birds and mice he had expierence with, as well as the occasional squirrel. Slinking forward, he checked his wind position and then pounced, delivering the killing bite before the bird could call an alarm.

Sunpaw sat up, pleased with himself. The Clan would appreciate this food. He hoped to find more for them, to prove himself worthy to them.

Burying his prey, he made his way into the forest.

-

Near sundown, Sunpaw circled back around to the spot he had left Vixenpaw in to find the brown cat stalking a squirrel through the grass.

The orange cat slowed down his pace until he was trotting across the grass, and eventually drew to an even stop several paces away from Vixenpaw. Despite how angry the little fucker made him, he didn't want to cost him his kill.

Sunpaw observed him, glancing at his haunches and blinking. His form was good, if not slightly unbalanced. It looked to Sunpaw like Vixenpaw hadn't been trained very long in this, which, fair, they were still apprentices. The only reason Sunpaw was an apprentice was because of his lack of knowledge on Clan traditions, but he was sure Vixenpaw was apprenticed because, well, he was young. Sunpaw's age, yes, but age didn't matter in BloodClan, and Sunpaw had been taught well. Vixenpaw had to abide by the rules of the Clan, which were a lot more fair to its younger members.

Vixenpaw pounced in a much messier fashion than Sunpaw had. His paws hit the back of the squirrel, but it squealed and darted between his claws before he could deliver the final blow. Vixenpaw sat up, scowling as he hissed, "Mouse-dung!"

"Need help?" Sunpaw asked, and Vixenpaw whirled around. Sunpaw's whiskers twitched with amusement as he realized he had caught Vixenpaw off guard. 

"No!" Vixenpaw growled. "Why would I need help from a kittypet?"

"I wasn't a kittypet." Sunpaw sighed. So much for offering assistance. He turned away from Vixenpaw, heading over to his prey stash. It was a large catch - including his sparrow, he had also caught three mice and, by luck, a rabbit. The Clan would be pleased with him.

"You caught all that?" Vixenpaw asked, and Sunpaw nearly flinched as he realized Vixenpaw had slid up beside him unexpectedly.

"Yeah." Sunpaw flicked his tail. "What'd you get?"

Vixenpaw frowned and shifted on his paws. "I caught a mouse earlier." 

His voice was so small that Sunpaw couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Blinking at him slowly, Sunpaw turned and picked up two of his mice, dropping them in front of Vixenpaw. "Here. Tell them you caught these."

Vixenpaw's hackles rose. "What? I rather-"

"Listen, this was supposed to be a partnered hunting exercise anyway. I'm just trying to save your ass. Either accept the help or stop looking so fucking pitiful. Your back and forth games are getting on my nerves." Sunpaw growled. Vixenpaw's eyes narrowed, and Sunpaw saw rage there, but instead of responding he snatched up Sunpaw's mice and stomped over to his own catch, leaving Sunpaw alone.

 _Stupid furball!_ Sunpaw thought.

-

The two apprentices were welcomed into the Clan with surprised murmurings and hungry stares.

Sunpaw dropped his catch on the fresh-kill pile and took a few steps away from it before sitting down. The Clan came over to inspect their victories as Vixenpaw dropped his share on the pile and puffed out his chest.

Gorsestem wove his way through the crowd until he came to a stop in front of Sunpaw. "Sunpaw." His voice was cold.

"Gorsestem." Sunpaw shot back, equally cold.

Sunpaw didn't particularly like Gorsestem. The older cat had made it clear that he felt more burdened than honored to have Sunpaw as an apprentice. From asking around, Sunpaw learned that Gorsestem was a fairly young warrior - only a few moons older than Vixenpaw and him - which made his condescending attitude even worse. Sunpaw swore to himself that one of these days he'd claw the warrior's ears off.

"How did the hunt go?" Gorsestem asked, forcing Sunpaw out of his annoyance.

Without wasting time, Sunpaw told Gorsestem about his hunt, making up some bullshit lie about how Vixenpaw had been the greatest partner ever and how they had defintely tracked down part of that prey together. He made sure to compliment Vixenpaw's form, not mentioning his observations about Vixenpaw's balance. He was sure it wouldn't be very well received.

Gorsestem listened with interest and then nodded, thanking him and heading off to the leader's den. Possibly to report, or maybe to gossip, who knew. Sunpaw didn't necessarily care.

"Yeah, I caught that." Sunpaw turned his head to watch Vixenpaw puff out his chest at some pretty little she-cat, grinning. "I've known how to catch rabbits since I stepped foot out of the nursery - only a moron wouldn't be able to pull that off."

Briefly Sunpaw thought about Vixenpaw's failure with catching the squirrel.

"Funny that you should say that, Vixenpaw." Sunpaw interjected. "Because I seem to recall my teeth in that rabbit's neck, not yours."

Vixenpaw jerked his head around and leveled Sunpaw with a glare. For a few moments they stared daggers at one another before Sunpaw broke it off with a toss of his head.

"But, you know, have fun telling your Clanmates lies. I'm sure they really appreciate it."

Sunpaw caught his angry look before turning and heading towards the apprentice's den, seeing himself out for the night.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy some bif content !!!

In the days that followed, Sunpaw made the very quick decision that he needed to talk to Brokenrye.

The warrior knew Strikemist - _Zoe_ \- and Sunpaw needed information on her. He needed information on how Vixenpaw was connected to all of this. 

Training was difficult to get away from, however, as oftentimes Sunpaw was set on a rigid schedule. He had never had such a strict schedule in BloodClan - but, he relented, this wasn't BloodClan. It was just... annoying.

It took a good bit of asking around before he figured out who the cat that had previously been named Bif was. As long as he had the knowledge, Sunpaw could wait to speak to him. It wasn't like things were going to change or whatever. Zoe was already fucking dead.

-

It had to have been about a quarter moon since his hunting session with Vixenpaw when he was finally able to get enough time to himself to track down Brokenrye. 

The warrior looked at him with disdain, turning from his Clanmate like Sunpaw had interrupted something. Sunpaw slowed down and dipped his head apologetically - if he wanted to do this right, he'd have to be respectful.

"Brokenrye, may I speak with you alone?" Sunpaw asked, sitting down neatly in front of the warrior. Brokenrye hesitated, then murmured to his Clanmate to go ahead. After his friend was out of earshot, he nodded to Sunpaw. 

"What is it?" 

"I needed to speak with you about your sister." Sunpaw told him evenly. Brokenrye narrowed his eyes. 

"What could you possibly want with my _dead_ sister?" 

Despite his irritation, Sunpaw could hear the pain behind his growl. He let guilt wash over him - _I'm so sorry, Brokenrye_ \- and then sighed softly.

"I'm the cat who brought news of her passing to RiverClan." Sunpaw said quietly. Brokenrye looked shocked. "I was with her when she died, and she asked me to take the message to you. I... I want to know a little more about her cirumstances, and how she came to be exiled from RiverClan."

Brokenrye seemed to process his request, and then lowered his head. The mask he had put on before lifted as he took in a shuddering breath, and Sunpaw felt suddenly alarmed. He hoped he wasn't upsetting the other tom - before he could ask, Brokenrye lifted his head again and fixed him with a soft look.

"Before I tell you anything, you have to promise me something." 

Sunpaw was curious. "Anything." he answered eagerly.

"You have to promise to tell me how she died. I... I need to know what happened, what she did or..." Brokenrye's voice got choked up and he averted his gaze. Sunpaw hesitated - he didn't know if he could retell the brutal murder he had committed without shaking up, but... he had to try.

"I haven't told any cat this." Sunpaw said quietly. "But I was raised by BloodClan." Brokenrye jerked his head back to Sunpaw with a look of shock. "I'm assuming you've heard of them." He hesitated, then nodded.

"Edgar's cats found Zoe at the border." Sunpaw watched Brokenrye's muscles tense at his sister's old name. "I was a part of his inner circle and often hung out in his den. His cats brought her to us while I happened to be there."

Sunpaw shifted on his paws as memories flashed through his head. "Edgar asked her why she had returned, and she said she had been exiled from her new Clan. She said she had been renamed Strikemist, and that you - Bif - had been renamed Brokenrye. She was willing to make it up to him for her assassination attempt. But... Edgar was... really angry."

Sunpaw took in a deep breath. "I tried to stand up for her, because she seemed like a reliable warrior. Edgar shot me down and accused me of being a traitor. I told him I wasn't, but he wanted me to prove it, and... and ordered me to kill her."

Brokenrye's fur bristled and Sunpaw felt guilt flash through him. "I trusted Edgar's judgement because his cats had been like parents to me, but as I watched her bleeding I felt so... so bad about it. Edgar's cats slunk away and then... Zoe stirred. We talked briefly, she told me she wanted me to bring a message to you, so... I did. When I returned to BloodClan, Edgar exiled me, and..." _Mom._ "A-and killed my mother in front of me."

Brokenrye's eyes widened. _Move on from it. Don't show too many emotions here_. "I didn't have anywhere else to go. I didn't have a father, so I came back to RiverClan. I was hoping to find you here, and figure out what happened to her. She was so beautiful and seemed so strong - I wanted to make it up to her. I needed to fix what I had done." He dug his claws into the dirt. "I don't know if information is going to help that, but it's all I can do. It's all I know how to do."

Brokenrye was quiet. It was a tense silence, and Sunpaw was sure he was angry. If he got attacked Sunpaw wouldn't blame him. If someone had stood in front of him and told him that they had killed his mother? Yeah, Sunpaw would attack them, no questions asked.

But Brokenrye seemed to slowly deflate. His tail twitched, and his face flickered between different emotions. Grief, anger, relief. Eventually he settled on gentle melancholy, and sighed.

"Thank you for telling me. I... don't like what you did, but I know how it feels to be a part of BloodClan. If you hadn't of killed Strikemist, it would have made it worse on yourself."

Sunpaw felt relieved, and dipped his head to Brokenrye graciously. He hadn't expected his kindness, and still didn't feel fully deserving of it.

"As promised, I'll give you information of how she was exiled." He glanced at the sky and then back at Sunpaw. "Perhaps it'd be better to walk while we talked?"

Sunpaw agreed.

-

"Strikemist was the strongest, smartest, prettiest cat I had ever seen." Brokenrye's voice was wistful, but sad. "She was my only family. We had both been orphaned from a young age."

"I'm sorry about that." Sunpaw said softly.

The two toms had started a route towards the river, and were now approaching the WindClan border. Brokenrye had walked in silence before beginning his speech, and Sunpaw had followed in comfortable companionship as he let the sounds of the forest soothe him.

"When we came to the Clan, we weren't quick to be accepted at all. The Clans don't like change. But Strikemist proved herself better than I ever could - she fought for the Clan in a battle against ThunderClan. She was admired and cherished, and as a show of their respect for her she was given her warrior name."

Brokenrye broke into a gentle purr. "It felt amazing, being named alongside her, but I didn't really feel as though I deserved it. She had won the battle, after all - I had been on a hunting patrol, and only got my name by association. But, regardless, I was proud."

Sunpaw drew to a stop as they reached the gorge. The two cats peered into WindClan territory and then started along the boundary.

"Strikemist made a point to befriend a lot of cats in the Clan, and would always introduce me to them. She was a lot more friendly than I was and wanted to show the Clan that she was trustworthy. She had always adjusted better than me." He let out a _mrrow_ of amusement.

His expression darkened. "One of these cats was Vixenpaw."

"Vixenpaw?" Sunpaw's ears perked up. _Finally, I get to learn something about this cat._

"Vixenpaw and Strikemist were close. Vixenpaw was younger than her by a few moons but they still got along. I don't know what caused it - I've always found him too arrogant for his own coat. But she liked him, truly." He hesitated. "Until they got in an argument. I don't know what it was about... Strikemist refused to tell me. But, after that, they were no longer friends."

Sunpaw felt confused. _A mystery argument?_ He let Brokenrye continue.

"Vixenpaw was angry. He has connections to Crabstar somehow, and so, every day, he'd go into Crabstar's den. No one knew what it was about, at first. It seemed he was getting into trouble a lot himself. But he wasn't - he was spreading lies about Strikemist. He told Crabstar that she had stolen prey from the queens, that she had threatened an elder... he told him that he had had a dream that Strikemist would ruin us all one day."

Sunpaw could hear the growl in his throat. "Great StarClan." He mumbled, and Brokenrye muttered agreement.

"Crabstar believed him, and called a Clan meeting. Listed off all of Strikemist's supposed crimes and exiled her on the spot." He spat. "The Clan was beyond upset. Half of them believed Vixenpaw and half of them didn't. Throughout the entire thing Vixenpaw looked on, expressionless, as if he _wasn't_ ruining someone's life." 

Brokenrye stopped as they drew up to fourtrees. Sunpaw glanced at him. The tom's eyes were glowing with grief and anger. "I hate that apprentice. I can't believe he got away with what he did. And because of him - because of his lies, my sister is _dead_."

Brokenrye lowered his head, and Sunpaw looked away.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kindve a review / filler chapter :)

It was fascinating how someone who had done something so abhorrently cruel could sleep so peacefully.

Sunpaw considered this for a moment and decided maybe that was hypocritical. He was a murderer, and he still slept soundly, but his circumstances had at least, somewhat, explained it. Vixenpaw, with his chest rising and falling, his face the picture perfect description of calm, had none of that.

Sunpaw dug his claws into the ground, his tail twitching. He had been unable to go to sleep after the sun went down, and the den was now bathed in shadow. Vixenpaw, with his pelt as dark as tree bark, blended in quite well, but Sunpaw was close enough to see him in better detail.

What Brokenrye had told him had been playing on repeat in his mind all day. The fact that Vixenpaw had manipulated a leader - a Clan leader, for fuck's sake - to kick out a vulnerable Clan warrior disgusted Sunpaw. He had half a mind to yell at the stupid apprentice, but figured it would be more trouble than it was worth.

Sunpaw thought of Strikemist and curled his lip. She had been so sweet, so kind - and now she was gone. Partially because of him, too, but Sunpaw knew he had had no choice in the matter. The fur along his spine rose and he slowly climbed out of his nest.

Vixenpaw might be his Clanmate but that didn't mean Sunpaw wasn't very suspicious of him. And quite frankly, if he could, Sunpaw would rather sleep in a cold valley than beside him. At least for the time being.

It was time to go on a walk.

-

Night time was pretty peaceful in the forest by the river.

In Twolegplace, night didn't really mean much. Twolegs still roamed and so did predators, always lurking amongst the scrapcans in search of spare food. 

But here, it felt safe. Maybe it was due to Sunpaw finally feeling as though he were becoming a part of his group of cats, or maybe it was simply the call of the wild. Sunpaw wasn't sure.

His paws skimmed a log as he jumped over it, landing on a rocky slope on the other side. The land gently made its way down to the riverbank from here. Sunpaw carefully climbed down the little hill, eventually sitting next to the bank. 

The sound of water running brushed his ear fur and caused Sunpaw to relax. Owls hooted somewhere behind him, and the wind caused the leaves on the trees to rustle. Sunpaw let his gaze turn up towards the sky - towards silverpelt. He scanned the small pinpricks of light that had been so difficult to see in BloodClan, and truly felt as if he were a part of something bigger than himself.

There had never been any sort of spiritual belief where he was from. Here, there was. Sunpaw didn't know if anyone actually watched over him or not, but it seemed... comforting, to think someone might be. To think Strikemist might be.

His thoughts drifted back to Nectarpaw's reaction after he had first arrived. 

The chosen one, huh? Sunpaw didn't know if he believed it. What could he - a former murderer - do to stop bloodshed and dictatorship? Crabstar was a fine leader (if not easily manipulated) and hadn't seemed to hurt anyone just yet. Maybe this mysterious StarClan didn't know what they were talking about.

(Of course, there was the possibility that they were right, but that made Sunpaw uneasy. Did that mean there was someone here who wanted to harm the Clan? But who could that be? His brain whispered Vixenpaw, but he pushed it aside. Vixenpaw was an apprentice - he couldn't harm an entire Clan.

Could he?)

As the moon began to sink lower in the sky, Sunpaw's thoughts turned from Strikemist, to his mother. Whatever StarClan had foretold about him, he hoped they had welcomed his mother with open arms. Sure, she hadn't been the best to him, but he still loved her, and he felt as though it was his fault she had died.

 _I could have done something, really._ Sunpaw closed his eyes and pushed the thoughts away. Brooding over it wouldn't help. All that was left now was to push through and try his best to be a better cat.

Dawn was blossoming over the horizon by the time Sunpaw slipped back into the apprentice's den.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idiot boys go fishing, which goes as well as you might expect it too  
>   
> (also this chapter was a bitch to write my motivation has been all over the place can we get a mfing F)

Sunpaw was completely still. Around him, the forest was completely silent. The only entity that pulsed with life was the large, broad river beneath his paw. 

A shadow flickered underneath the water. Sunpaw flashed his paw out, outstretching his claws, and within a moment he had hooked a fish. He curved his paw and slammed it onto the ground next to him, but he wasn't fast enough; it wriggled back into the water and disappeared downstream.

"Fox-dung," Sunpaw hissed as he heard Vixenpaw purring from beside him. He turned to see smug amusement in his denmate's gaze.

"I can't believe the badass fighter boy from Twolegplace can't catch his own food." Vixenpaw teased. "It's almost like you were a kittypet, eh?"

"I was not." Sunpaw let irritation seep into his tone. "I already told you to stop calling me that." 

Vixenpaw was annoying in any regard, but especially with his insistence about Sunpaw's heritage. It felt even more insulting due to the fact that Vixenpaw was _right._ Sunpaw had been a kittypet at one point, but he had been trained out of those roots and didn't think it was fair to say that that was where he came from.

He came from BloodClan, he was raised by BloodClan, and that was that. Twolegs had no right to claim any part of his kithood.

(It also felt incredibly ironic that Vixenpaw insisted on teasing him about being a kittypet, yet had picked up on his "kittypet" swear words. Listening to him say fuck was so fucking hilarious the first time he did it that Sunpaw thought he'd die from laughter alone).

Today hadn't been too awful, however, so Sunpaw was trying not to complain about it so much. Despite being stuck with Gorsestem and Vixenpaw, he had been learning new skills (that he wasn't particularly good at, to be quite honest). Sunpaw liked learning, especially if the new skills he picked up helped him in the long run. Fishing, and by association, swimming, were both valuable skills that could come in handy to someone like Sunpaw, who had learned to survive with a majority of backstreet alleycat skills. Today they were focusing on on-shore fishing as opposed to swimming.

Gorsestem had showed him a couple of things about how to do it, but so far it just seemed that Sunpaw lacked speed. The fish continued to get away from him no matter how much he practiced, and frustration was starting to make his fur prick. Vixenpaw's teasing wasn't helping in the slightest.

(He wasn't really sure why Vixenpaw had to come along with them to training sessions. It seemed that his mentor didn't particularly care for him - he was always being passed around between the Clan warriors, which bothered Sunpaw more than he cared to admit. He wasn't actually sure who Vixenpaw's real mentor was - maybe no one had claimed him? But that felt really unusual, considering the structured way the Clans ran).

"Do you want me to help you?" Vixenpaw slid up next to him and Sunpaw felt his fur bristle. "I've been doing this for longer than you have, you know."

Gorsestem had moved away from them, sitting near the edge of the forest. He had directed his attention towards them, ears pricking at Vixenpaw's offer. "You know, maybe it would be good to have your peers helping you learn." He meowed thoughtfully, and Sunpaw flattened his ears. _No it won't! Vixenpaw is NOT my peer!_

"You'll just use it as an excuse to be a dick." Sunpaw hissed. "I think I'll pass."

Vixenpaw regarded him with a leveled look. He seemed to chew on Sunpaw's statement for a few stretched moments, and then flicked his ear. "I'll be nice." He murmured. "I promise. It's just odd seeing you struggle."

Sunpaw felt an uncomfortable feeling jolt through his body, and he shifted away from Vixenpaw. _Odd? You seem to take pleasure in it!_

"I guess. Gorsestem will make you help me anyway." 

Vixenpaw's whiskers twitched, and he seemed, very suddenly, incredibly eager. "Okay. Do what you were doing."

Sunpaw gave him a wary glance and then settled himself into position. He still didn't trust Vixenpaw, but he knew he didn't have much of a choice.

"Your position is really good when it comes to keeping your shadow off the water, and your paw-hook is amazing, especially since you said you've never done this." Vixenpaw moved to press a paw to Sunpaw's shoulder, and Sunpaw felt weirded out that he seemed to be getting complimented. "But the way you hold your weight on one side is hindering your speed. Shift this way."

Sunpaw shifted in the direction that Vixenpaw indicated. 

"I think that should work." Vixenpaw took a step back, giving him space. "Try that." 

Once again, the world was still. Sunpaw waited until a flash of shadow appeared under the water, and with a flash of his paw, he managed to hook a fish. Quickly Sunpaw bore down on it, nipping the spine with a clean killing bite.

Sunpaw took a step back, twitching his whiskers as the smell of fish threatened him. _I did it._ He glowed with pride, but when he looked to Vixenpaw for approval, he was met with smugness.

"Told you it'd work." He said, cheeky.

"Shut the hell up." Sunpaw narrowed his eyes, instantly irritated again.

Vixenpaw flashed him a cocky smirk as Gorsestem picked his way down to the shore. He took a look at Sunpaw's catch, his tail raising in the air. "Impressive," he purred.

"Thanks," Sunpaw grunted.

"It seems you work better under peer review. Why don't you get Vixenpaw to teach you to swim?" Gorsestem tilted his head. "As long as you're both back by sundown."

What? Why the hell would Sunpaw want to be taught by _Vixenpaw_ , of all cats? "No, I think this will be all for today." Sunpaw said, feigning politeness.

"I insist." Gorsestem purred. "I'll take your prey back to camp for you."

Sunpaw watched, dumbfounded, as his mentor picked up his fish. _No fucking way._

-

"Keep your chin up, idiot!" A hiss cut across the water and Sunpaw gasped as his paw slipped on a pebble and he went under again, his head quickly bobbing up to the surface only a few seconds later. He sneezed.

Vixenpaw had decided that hands-on was the best way to go for this situation. He had Sunpaw wade into the water until he was on his tippy toes, trying hard to keep his head above the surface. Sunpaw had complained that their height difference made this unfair, so Vixenpaw had waded out just a little further, since he was the taller of the two.

"Now, swimming is like running." Vixenpaw's voice came again. "Just keep moving your legs like you would on land!"

"Vixenpaw, I can't _do_ this-"

"It isn't hard, dumbass. Just go for it."

Urged on by his incessant taunting, Sunpaw kicked out into the water. His heavy fur immediately dragged him down, and he only had a moment to gasp before his head went under. 

The current was stronger than any enemy Sunpaw had met in his life, and he flailed his legs, confused by this new underwater world. Water filled his ears and silenced everything, and it was hard to breathe.

He kicked out with his legs and his head broke the surface for a moment. He snatched a lungful of air and then went under again.

It was so difficult to keep moving. Something hit his side hard and the breath was knocked out of him, his mouth becoming full of water. He struggled as his fur caught on something, trying desperately to go back up. 

_Shit._

There was a tug on his scruff just as he began to panic, and Vixenpaw pulled him to the surface. Sunpaw coughed and spluttered against him, wheezing as the bigger cat dragged him to the surface and dropped him as if he weighed nothing.

Sunpaw coughed up a mouthful of water and laid on the hard pebbles for a moment, taking in large, gasping breaths. His entire body was shaking more than it had in his entire life. That... had been super scary. He had never felt that loss of control before, had never...

Vixenpaw wasn't saying anything.

Sunpaw tensed as he expected an insult of some sort, but when he rose his head he saw that Vixenpaw's eyes were wide with worry. His tail was twitching with agitation as water streamed from his long fur - with it clinging to his sides, he looked a lot less like a cat and a lot more like a rat, Sunpaw thought.

"Are you okay?" Vixenpaw questioned, quiet and soft, like he was legimately scared. And... yeah, okay, maybe he was. It was probably safe to assume that Vixenpaw had never seen another cat in pain in his entire life.

"Yeah," Sunpaw croaked, "just tired." He tried to stand, but his legs felt like bags of sand, and he slowly sunk back to the ground with a grunt.

"Rest." Vixenpaw told him and then got up. "I'm going to... hunt. Just rest."

 _He seems agitated._ Sunpaw noted as Vixenpaw left him to dry. He passed his tongue over his fur a few times and _ugh, God, what the hell._ He _hated_ the feeling of water.

This shit _sucked._

-

Vixenpaw returned with a large rabit that he dumped at Sunpaw's paws unceremoniously. "Here."

"What?" Sunpaw had started to doze as Vixenpaw left, but was startled awake in his surprise. The smell of fresh-kill tempted him, and he sat up to lick his lips.

"I figured it'd give you enough energy to make it back to camp." Vixenpaw shrugged. "Just eat it." 

Sunpaw didn't need to be told twice. Bending his head down, he gulped down the rabbit, eventually sitting back and licking his jaws. He was starting to feel better, even though he was exhausted and felt like a bruise was forming where his side had hit, uh, whatever it was in that river.

"We should be heading back." He told Vixenpaw. The other cat nodded and shook out his fur. Sunpaw noticed that it had begun to stick up in odd clumps as it dried, amusement washing over him at the observation. He looked so messed up, it was almost cute.

Sunpaw padded just behind the other cat as Vixenpaw led the way, eventually getting lost in thought. It was strange how caring the other seemed, considering his initial hostility to Sunpaw's arrival. He frowned and stared at his side.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" He asked Vixenpaw. 

Vixenpaw gave him a look of surprise over his shoulder. "You nearly drowned, would you rather I bite your head off about it?"

Fair enough.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> petey time petey time  
>   
> also we are 1/4 of the way there yeehaw :) also damn this chapter is short but it was also meant to be kinda filler - next chapter should be a bit longer

Sunpaw had never nearly drowned before, so it was definitely a new expierence to be way too entirely fatigued by this situation.

His jaws parted in a yawn as he followed Vixenpaw into camp. Really, it wasn't too bad now that he had gotten the hang of reality again - he was just tired - but Vixenpaw steered him towards the medicine den anyway like some sort of overprotective mother.

(With a pang, Sunpaw thought of his own, and wondered how she was doing in whatever afterlife she managed to end up in).

"I don't need to go to the medicine den," he complained, even as his paws seemed to instinctively follow Vixenpaw. 

Vixenpaw looked over his shoulder, but didn't stop. "Shut up. If I didn't save your stupid ass, you'd be dead, so yes, you're seeing a medicine cat."

Sunpaw grunted, and decided not to argue too much. It was rare that Vixenpaw ever graced him with a kind shoulder (Sunpaw figured he'd at least be insulted over his heritage once or twice by now) so he decided to take full advantage of it before Vixenpaw decided to flip that around on him again.

-

Upon their entrance, Nectarpaw turned his head and regarded Sunpaw with wide eyes.

"What did you two get yourselves into?" Nectarpaw hissed, sounding more worried than angry as he bounced across the short clearing towards Sunpaw, who kept his mouth shut to let Vixenpaw do all the talking.

"The idiot doesn't know how to swim and nearly fucking drowned." Vixenpaw hissed. Sunpaw bristled slightly under Nectarpaw's inspection, but otherwise didn't move. He should have expected hostility from Vixenpaw's tone the second he set paw near another cat. 

All kindness had its limits.

"I see." Nectarpaw frowned and then pulled away from Sunpaw to headbutt Vixenpaw's side. "Out. I can't treat my patient if you keep hovering over him."

"What?" Vixenpaw looked startled. "You can't-"

"Considering Dawnfrost is out, I'm the lead medicine cat right now, which means yes, I very much can." Nectarpaw murmured sternly. "Don't worry so much. He's in safe hands."

Vixenpaw looked at Sunpaw and scoffed, his expression suddenly unreadable. "I'm not worried. I don't like being told what to do. There's a difference."

"Well, for right now, you're going to have to like it." Nectarpaw flicked his tail. "Out!"

Grumbling to himself, Vixenpaw pulled himself away from the two and exited the den.

-

"I don't get what you see in him, Nectarpaw." 

Sunpaw had taken to lying in a spare nest in the medicine den. While Nectarpaw had told him that he was pretty sure Sunpaw was fine, the apprentice medicine cat still wanted to keep an eye on him just in case. It wasn't every day that cats nearly drowned, after all. Sunpaw could return to his duties in the morning.

Nectarpaw shrugged. "He's cool."

"He's not cool." Sunpaw hissed. "Come on, you're not stupid. You have to know about Strikemist-"

"The allegations concerning Strikemist were all rumours, Sunpaw." Nectarpaw's voice was angry, even if the tiny cat didn't look up from where he shuffled herbs around with his paw.

"Well, whatever! We all know that he did it, even Strikemist knew! He was petty so he had to go and fuck up some poor girl's life. Fuck him."

Nectarpaw glanced over his shoulder, and Sunpaw felt his heart freeze at the amount of ice contained in one look. "He saved your life, idiot! You should have more faith in him. He never confirmed the allegations."

"He never denied them."

"He shouldn't have to! He's an apprentice that's hated by the majority of this Clan for no reason whatsoever and, for once, he seems to be trying to make a friend out of you. But you keep shoving him away! Even when he brings you to this den for medical attention after a near death expierence that you tell me he saved you from, you still bristle at him like he just killed your entire family. What gives?"

Sunpaw found himself stunned as Nectarpaw stomped around the den, sorting herbs and waiting for an answer that Sunpaw didn't think he'd ever have. Was it right of him to prematurely judge Vixenpaw? He frowned to himself. 

He had noticed that not many liked him, but it was still so hard to get over what he knew regarding Strikemist and Vixenpaw's past. Sunpaw wouldn't be doing any of this if it weren't for Strikemist. But... what if he had been mistaken about something? What if he was wrong about Vixenpaw?

Sunpaw nearly jumped when Nectarpaw dropped a leaf bundle in front of him. "Eat these, asshole. They'll put you to sleep but help with your sore muscles."

"Thanks." Sunpaw muttered and licked the small seeds up. They were black - poppy seeds, maybe. He curled up into a sleeping position and shut his eyes.

Whatever shit he had to think about Vixenpaw, it could wait until morning. Nectarpaw had a point - Sunpaw needed a nap.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KNOW ITS BEEN A MONTH IM SO SORRY HERES MORE SMOPKINS AS PROMISED  
>   
> btw i also fixed the formatting to not include roman numerals in previous chapters bc this was originally going to be a one shot and then my bitchass wrote multiple chapters and the one shot formatting just didnt cut it so

The forest was completely silent, which was only somewhat disturbing.

It was a beautiful night. The moon was nearly full, and the stars glittered in the sky above Sunpaw as he made his way through the trees. He had slept in Nectarpaw's den as instructed and then been sent back out into the life of a RiverClan apprentice. Only a few days had passed since then, and Sunpaw once again found himself thinking about a stupid apprentice with brown fur.

He found himself feeling extremely guilty over the past couple of days, which was an emotion Sunpaw didn't like to wear. He simply didn't do guilt, or grudges, or anything of the sort. Long-term emotions were exhausting. He rather lock that away and deal with it later. Therefore, after two days, he had come to the conclusion that maybe he was wrong about Vixenpaw.

It was possible that what he knew about Strikemist's past were all rooted in allegation. The only one who would know for certain what happened was Vixenpaw, but Vixenpaw didn't seem to enjoy speaking of anything that could be considered emotional, so it wasn't like Sunpaw could ask. The only other cat was Crabstar, but, like, no - Sunpaw was an apprentice, and if he brought an accusation against his friend to his leader it would only reflect badly on himself. Especially after being with the Clan for such a short period of time.

This shit was starting to get exhausting to him, and while he still cared deeply about Strikemist getting justice, it dawned on him that maybe she didn't need or want it. Maybe she had simply been at the wrong place at the wrong time. Maybe this was her fate.

Sunpaw still didn't like it, but he felt tired trying to tackle such a huge mystery. Especially if he wasn't being given any leads.

Despite that, he still didn't fully trust Vixenpaw. Vixenpaw might have saved his life, but he was sure he had something to do with Strikemist's situation. There had to be a reason why the good majority of the Clan disliked him as well. So many people either shunned him or were super fucking condescending (almost annoyingly so) just because Vixenpaw seemed to exist.

From a new perspective (thanks, Nectarpaw) Sunpaw frowned down at his paws as he walked and thought about how this looked from the outside. Maybe he was wrong in his assessment of this, too, though? Why were adults bullying a child to begin with? That was... strange, to say the least.

Sunpaw's frown deepened as he followed a well trodden scent trail towards the river. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice the cat who had slid in front of his path until he was nearly on top of him.

Sunpaw stumbled back and hissed as he took on Vixenpaw's form. He was slightly taller than Sunpaw, with a lot more fur, but Sunpaw was more muscular. Vixenpaw's amber eyes were fixed on him, and Sunpaw shivered.

Did Vixenpaw follow him?

"What are you doing out so late?" Sunpaw meowed, trying not to let his suspicions seep into hus voice. Vixenpaw was staring at him as if he could see straight through him, and it was starting to creep him the fuck out.

"I wanted to speak with you. In private." Vixenpaw sat down, wrapping his tail neatly around his paws. He looked so composed, so prepared for this conversation, and Sunpaw felt angry about it. He had to one-up this man somehow, show him that he wasn't startled by his sudden presence.

"Okay, speak then. I ain't got all night." 

Vixenpaw paused a beat and Sunpaw wondered if he was off-put by Sunpaw's curt display. "I realized the other day, after you nearly drowned, that you might be falling behind in some of your skills. I was wondering if you'd be interested in letting me help you. Alone."

Sunpaw's immediate reaction was anger. Was Vixenpaw really trying to say he was inadequate? He was half tempted to bring up how bad Vixenpaw was at hunting. 

Then Sunpaw thought about what Nectarpaw had said, about how Vixenpaw had been trying to get closer to him. Sunpaw was suddenly aware of the nervous glitter in Vixenpaw's eyes. 

Maybe he did want to be friends. Maybe he wasn't as put together as Sunpaw thought.

"I guess." Sunpaw answered, his head spinning in confusion.

Vixenpaw's eyes widened slightly, as if he couldn't believe Sunpaw had agreed to meet, and then he nodded. "We could-"

"Not tonight." Sunpaw shifted uncomfortably. "It's late and I have an early patrol assigned for tomorrow. I was only out here to clear my head before sleeping."

"Oh." Sunpaw noticed that Vixenpaw flexed his claws whenever he got nervous. "Well, that's fine. Whenever is most convenient to you, your highness."

Sunpaw rolled his eyes. "We can meet tomorrow, but don't be a dick about it."

Vixenpaw sighed. "Fine."

And so it was agreed.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hii i made an effort to make this chapter longer than the others since these chapters were getting shorter and i didn't like it <3 enjoy these kitties fucking around lmao

It was dark in the RiverClan training hollow, the moonlight causing Sunpaw's amber eyes to flash whenever he turned his head to survey his surroundings. He was alert, keeping his guard up in case of any enemies - though, honestly, he was pretty sure he wouldn't meet anyone dangerous. Clan territory was usually well-protected, even after dark.

Sunpaw only had to wait a little while before Vixenpaw slipped into the training hollow and trotted over to him with quick, light steps. His brown fur blended in better with the shadows than Sunpaw's own, orange fur, but his amber eyes still flashed all the same, mirroring Sunpaw's own light-reflective orbs. 

"I'm here." Vixenpaw announced as he stopped in front of Sunpaw. Sunpaw almost huffed in exasperation.

"I can see you, I have eyes. You don't have to announce your presence."

Vixenpaw looked offended. "Shut up, kittypet. You said you'd help me train and I was offering a _greeting_."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Sunpaw rolled his eyes, but he had to admit he didn't feel irritated. Instead, he was excited to be able to train with someone other than his mentor. It wasn't like his mentor was a _bad_ person, per se, just kind of... rude? 

He was honestly intolerable.

"This was your idea, so what are we starting out with?" Sunpaw asked gruffly, standing up to stretch. 

Logically, he assumed that Vixenpaw would choose a swimming lesson, or maybe another fishing lesson. He was thrown off guard when Vixenpaw instead replied with, "I was thinking about testing your fighting skills. I've seen how well you hunt and how awful you are at swimming, but I've never seen you fight."

"I don't need help with battle skills." Sunpaw told him, flexing his claws. 

"I just want to see them. If neither of us can benefit from it, then, well, I suppose we can do swimming. But it is a little more difficult to swim after dark."

"Fair point." 

With that, Sunpaw reluctantly agreed to Vixenpaw's offer. The two toms circled one another in the clearing, with only moonlight to show each other where they were.

Sunpaw was the one who leapt first. With a quick, precise move he darted beneath Vixenpaw's belly, letting his sheathed paw brush against the other's fur. Then, he whipped around and threw himself on the other's back, his teeth wrapping around Vixenpaw's neck in the ghost of a killing bite. Vixenpaw hardly had any time to react, and Sunpaw heard him gasp from beneath him.

Sunpaw released him and leapt neatly off. "Your guard was focused on your face. You need to be sure you're protecting every part of yourself when you go into battle." Sunpaw told him. "Enemies will spot weakness as soon as they can and use it to their advantage. Learn to spot those weak spots in yourself before they have a chance to do it for you." 

"That's... really good advice." Vixenpaw sounded shocked as he got to his paws and shook off his pelt. "It seems I've underestimated you once again."

"Where I grew up, danger was a constant. You either learned to fight back, or you died. Fighting comes easy to me now." Sunpaw explained, unsheathing his claws to dig them into the dirt below.

Vixenpaw stared at him for a few moments, studying his expression as if he had suddenly met an entirely new cat. Then, he nodded. "Okay. What else do you have, then? I think I can benefit from your expierence."

"I thought this was supposed to be about you training me?" Sunpaw teased, but in the back of his head, he felt pleased to have gained some form of positive feedback from this usually so cruel cat. _Its kind of nice to be acknowledged like this. Maybe Nectarpaw is right - maybe he really does like me._

Vixenpaw bristled and huffed, sitting down heavily on his haunches. "It was _supposed_ to be, yes. But plans change. I don't think you need as much help as I first thought."

Sunpaw let himself be pleased by this, and then twitched his whiskers. "What about swimming?"

"We can always set up more meetings, and I can teach you another time." Vixenpaw offered thoughtfully.

"Does that mean we'll be doing this again?" Sunpaw lashed his tail. "I didn't think this would become a regular thing."

"Too bad, so sad, Sunpaw. Yes, we'll be doing this again."

"Damn, that means I have to put up with your insufferable ass." Sunpaw made sure his claws were sheathed before swiping them at Vixenpaw's face. The cat in question gasped as the orange paw connected with his face.

"Who told you that you were allowed to be such a prick?" Vixenpaw hissed, dropping to his paws. "I'll teach you, kittypet!"

Vixenpaw's weight crashed into him full force, and Sunpaw was caught off guard. With a half-laugh, Sunpaw twisted, letting his back legs pummel up into his denmate's stomach. Vixenpaw bit down into Sunpaw's shoulder in retaliation. Sunpaw took note of the fact that he was sure not to bite too hard, and felt warmed by the kindness of his friend.

Friend? Were they even friends? As they scuffled, the thought throbbed in his head and confused him. They didn't really act like friends, and Sunpaw had spent a good portion of his time in RiverClan despising Vixenpaw. And yet...

"Get off, you great lump!" Sunpaw grunted and kicked up with one paw, pushing Vixenpaw off. Sunpaw was on his paws in an instant, pinning him down as Vixenpaw struggled to get up. "Surrender!"

"Never!"

"Surrender, fuckass! Just admit that I'm the king of this bitch already!"

"Fuck you, get off of me." 

Sunpaw added another paw to his mission to keep Vixenpaw pinned, his whiskers twitching. "You're struggling an awful lot for someone who could get up if he just surrended."

"Fine! Fine, you win, just get off!"

Sunpaw purred and stepped off of him, letting the long-furred cat get to his paws and shake off his pelt. "I'm telling you, man, sometimes you just gotta surrender to get what you want."

"Fuck you. You know you were doing that on purpose to humilate me."

"Yeah, maybe. What else are friends for?"

Vixenpaw met his gaze and Sunpaw felt something in him freeze. Did he overstep a boundary by declaring them friends? But something in Vixenpaw's gaze looked soft, like he enjoyed the fact that Sunpaw felt the same way. 

"Yeah, you're right. Friends are for beating the shit out of each other." He purred out, and before Sunpaw could react, he was leaping back onto him, catching him off guard for the second time that night.

They scuffled like that until dawn burst over the trees, drawing the birds from their slumber.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow?? gary updates this fic??? unheard of...

_The breeze ruffled his fur, bothering him more than anything had in a long fucking time. Whereas usually the feeling would be welcome, today is carried with it this feeling of wrongness, like something was severely off that he just couldn't quite grasp. It made his claws reflexively curl out and in, a nervous tic._

_He was able to rise off the boulder he was perched on, following the river's trailing path as the wind blew him in the direction of Fourtrees. If it weren't for the strangeness hanging in the air, Sunpaw would have classified today as peaceful._

_He got the edge of the clearing and began to pick his way through the bushes near the edge, not bothering to check for signs of life. There was no reason for another cat to be here - not when it wasn't the Gathering._

_This decision proved to be a mistake on his part as the metallic tang of blood touched the back of his mouth, causing him to still in his journey towards the center of the clearing._

_"Well, well. What do we have here?"_

_Sunpaw refused to look up, refused to acknowledge this as a betrayal. His heartbeat throbbed in his ears as he kept his eyes solely trained on the ground, denial wracking through him at the all too familiar voice._

_"You know, you really should be referred to as Jimmy. You never earned your apprentice name. I'd even argue that you aren't worthy enough to be in this Clan at all." Came the voice. There was a thump noise as the cat in question landed on his paws just in front of the great rock. "So how's about it, Jimmy-boy? Are you gonna give your good old pal Vixenstar a friendly welcome?"_

_When Sunpaw looked up, he was suddenly reminded that Vixenpaw was responsible for someone's death, even if indirectly. Around the grown Vixenstar's paws was drying blood that trailed all the way to the top of the Great Rock. It was gruesome - a violent murder, no, a massacre. It was like he purposefully splattered the blood there, to show off his victory. At the top of the rock, like a shining prize, was Nectarpaw's lifeless corpse._

_Sunpaw opened his mouth to respond to the grown cat before him, suddenly overwhelmed with how this version of Vixenpaw could match with the one he knew. The words choked him on the way out, feeling raw and bitter. Vixenstar's amber eyes glowed as he wrapped his way around Sunpaw, his blood smearing onto Sunpaw's orange fur. It was sticky, and it made him feel sick despite the murders he had commited with his own paws._

_"You don't hate me, do you, Jimmy? Friends don't hate each other." Came Vixenpaw - Vixenstar's - voice. "And we're friends. Closer, even... rivals. Now that I've gotten rid of the bitch threatening my spot as leader, I can finally say that its ti_ me to wake up!" 

A paw prodded his side and he leapt out, claws out. He barreled into his attacker without thinking and fastened his teeth in their throat, fear and panic and anger blending together in one mess of a survival instinct still carried with him from his days spent in BloodClan.

The alarmed meow of his friend pierced his ears, but all he could think about was drying blood on brown fur and Nectarpaw's body lying lifeless on the Great Rock. 

"Su- Sunpaw-" Came the stuttered attempt at words from the body beneath him, and he quickly detached, scrambling halfway across the den as his senses fully returned. Vixenpaw returned to his paws in a heartbeat.

There was no blood in his fur or body by his paws. Instead, this was Vixenpaw as Sunpaw had come to know him - as a friend, with wide shocked eyes and an overwise angry expression.

"What the _fuck_?" He hissed, and Sunpaw felt so guilty that he dropped his gaze off of Vixenpaw. He tried hard not to think about Vixenpaw technically being sort of responsible for a death.

 _Or was that my fault?_ He thought, then shrugged it off, because he knew playing the blame game for what happened with Strikemist would only result in his mood souring significantly more. Not worth it.

"Sorry. I... had a nightmare." 

Sunpaw didn't look at him. Despite this, he could feel the burning sensation of Vixenpaw's eyes boring into him.

A million questions seemed to hang in the air between them, but the one Vixenpaw inevitably settled on was, "Are you okay?" His tone was strangely quiet, for him, and Sunpaw didn't know if he liked it.

Sunpaw let his amber eyes shift to meet Vixenpaw's insistent gaze. They stared at one another for a moment that felt like years passed.

"Come on, boys!" Came a loud voice from outside, and they both jumped. Sunpaw quickly leapt out of his nest and slid past Vixenpaw, ignoring the question lingering in the air.

The two had been assigned to battle training today with their mentors. Ever since starting their nightly sessions two weeks ago, they had made rapid improvement in the areas they lacked skills in. Vixenpaw's mentor had been pleased to watch him _nearly_ beat Sunpaw, and Sunpaw had found himself strangely warmed by the happy glow coming from the other tom.

By the time the two got to the training hollow, Sunpaw had relaxed enough to trade friendly insults with Vixenpaw. He could tell his friend was still curious about what had prompted Sunpaw to lash out like he did, but he didn't say anything, instead choosing to banter with Sunpaw instead.

"I'm telling you, it is not _that_ simple to catch a fucking squirrel. I have no idea how those ThunderClan idiots do it. And I still don't know why you'd argue that we _should_ , either. They're all fur!" Vixenpaw meowed, rolling his eyes.

"It isn't about whether or not we should! Its about the _integrity._ " Sunpaw huffed. "You should always be able to catch one and you should always be willing to eat one to survive! That's just cold hard basic facts."

"If I were on my deathbed then I'd rather die than eat a squirrel." 

"Suit yourself but some of us are _intelligent_."

"You _wish_ you were intelligent."

"Oh, bite me." 

"Alright, quit it, you two." Came the meow from Vixenpaw's mentor. "We have to get this training session started or else we'll be here all day."

"We're battle training today?" Vixenpaw guessed and his mentor nodded. Sunpaw's mentor had positioned himself elegantly on the grass a few pawsteps away.

"Why don't the two of you practice so we can assess what you can do? Vixenpaw, you start by attacking Sunpaw." 

"Sure." Vixenpaw turns to face him and steadies himself. He's a lot better at this than when they first met; a lot steadier on his feet, too. Sunpaw would be proud if he still didn't have to train with him. 

The thing that Sunpaw had realized about Vixenpaw is that he was very fast, compared to Sunpaw's brute strength. Sunpaw made sure he put as little weight as possible on his paws so that when Vixenpaw finally lunged forward, teeth going for his throat, he could dodge out of the way, brushing his forepaw against Vixenpaw's leg in the imitation of a claw. Vixenpaw's teeth snapped down beside his ear.

Vixenpaw seemed to be expecting this out of him - probably because of how often they trained together nowadays, he had to admit. Before he could react, Vixenpaw had caught his hind paw and shoved, unbalancing him. He toppled into the dirt as Vixenpaw placed a paw on his shoulder, holding him down.

Dust settled around them, and Sunpaw breathed in heavily, dazed. All of his senses melted away. He was no longer in the training hollow, but instead at Fourtrees, with Vixenstar's taunting words in his ears. Amber eyes flashed at him and he felt his breathing hitch. Tensing his muscles, he surged forward, claws hooking in thick fur. He twisted his head to try and get at his opponent's throat as they tried to shove him away.

Teeth pricked the back of his neck and he gave a yowl of alarm as he was dragged off. In a blink he was back in the hollow, breathing heavy, his fur fluffed up twice its size with his claws digging into the ground. He vaguely recognized thick brown fur stuck between his claws.

His mentor was in front of him, an angry expression on his face. "And what do you think you're doing?"

Sunpaw breathed in and out, eyes flicking from his mentor's face to Vixenpaw, who was watching him with wide eyes, clump of fur tugged from his pelt. "Training?"

"Go back to camp. Crabstar will be hearing about this." His mentor spat. Sunpaw turned his gaze back to Vixenpaw once more, carefully schooling his expression into staying flat. He turned and started back towards camp.

He tried to figure out what the fuck was wrong with him as he walked out of the training hollow.

**Author's Note:**

> https://schoolfullofmorons.tumblr.com


End file.
